I Want To Publish Zines

**So this is going to be my new journal... New chapter and sense of self requires a fresh medium**

So this morning I woke up with a head full of regrets and an itchy tattoo.

I wish I could take back the things I said last night; Maybe the things I didn't say.
But it was said... And now it's done.
I can only hope that my bitter words have not caused unjust, unforgivable hurt.
I had a bad day, and I was stressed out... Which lead to self doubt and confusion... But she should never have been on the receiving end of my hurt.
I have been told that sorry is not required, but again, SORRY.
I mean that with everything inside of me... That so wasn't me you were talking to.

I had the laziestmotherfuckingday ever today...
Soccer this morning, which consisted of me sitting in the sun and listening music rather 'loudly'... And almost falling asleep... That is why I REALLY need sunglasses. Knew there was a reason.
Anyway, I think they lost the game.
And then I got home and ate heaps too much YET AGAIN... And fell asleep outside in a chair in the sun.
I woke up being attacked by some little bitey fuckers... That part was unpleasant can I just say.

The distance is not getting to me... I miss you yes... But I need time too. There is the study... And the learning how to operate an automobile... I do miss you when you go... But I kind of like missing you.
Please stop waiting for something to go horribly wrong... For me to see a flaw or to just randomly FREAK OUT and run. It is just not going to happen!
You say you trust me to do whatever makes me happy... So trust that it is you and that I am exactly where I want to be. I am here for the good and the bad and regardless of how long we may have to spend apart, please just know that you are always in my heart.
Oh gay that rhymed. But I had no other words that said it right.
I have all of the time in the world for this girl... Things fall in to place as they should... We have things to accomplish before we can live close by, and that is okay
I am scared though. Im falling hard and fast... And I fear she doesn't feel the same way. So I keep quiet.
But me and quiet are not friends... I need to verbalise my feelings, or my head may explode.
Perhaps my heart.
Whatever the case may be... I need to speak openly. Soon. Perhaps not so much with today. Or tomorrow.
But soon.
Maybe.

Anyway... Besides me and the bad day yesterday, LIFE = BEAUTIFUL.
So much going on... I admit my head is struggling with some of the over load, but I have never ever been happier in my life... Or felt more complete...
I am in my element here.


~*My hopes are so high, that your kiss might kill me... So why don't you kill me? So I die happy...*~

SIGH
Long long long long slow week ahead... Saturday hates me!

Coffee though... Coffee is my friend... And Jaimie is still too beautiful... And my GIRLFRIEND... So I think that she outweighs the coffeeness.